Rest Series (1/8): What some of us might need.

March, is a time when people begin to look forward to Spring. March, was a time when my body and mind wanted to begin and “winter.”

I was the opposite in the turning of the seasons.

As one season was ending, I found myself craving and wanting to stay. I found myself curling up on the couch, staring out the window, and not doing anything. I wanted to sleep. I wanted to rest.

And so, I began taking things off my schedule. I began getting rid of things that no longer served me in my business, personal life, and therapy practice. Past attempts trying to get rid of feeling tired or busy, were not successful. I needed to do something different this time. I had the realization, "Oh this is a product of me. I am the one recreating this pattern."

Go. Go. Go.

This pattern of doing more, being more, and not resting is in my blood. I come from a generation of women who do. Who work. Work until they are exhausted. Sick. Have adrenal fatigue. Or in some cases have fled because they couldn’t keep working. The fleeing led to a host of chaos but it was the body's way of dealing with the overworking.

Culturally speaking, especially in the United States, doing more is expected.

I have spent most of my life being busy. When I began listening to my body and how it wanted to rest I felt all sorts of feels. I felt guilty, scared, embarrassed, and even lazy. I also had all sorts of thoughts that looked like, “What will people think of me?” “Will anyone understand?” “Am I lazy?”

People’s reactions

Some people were shocked when I told them I was going to begin “resting.” Someone asked, “What does that even mean? What will that look like?” Another person stated, “So, you aren’t going to volunteer to be on this board anymore?” I found myself over-explaining to some, which was a way for me to soothe anxiety for fear of what they would say or think.

If I kept talking, they didn’t have a place to judge or to say something. I also found myself not always knowing how to put it into words. “Will people think I am depressed or that I have gone crazy?”

feelings and thoughts that showed up.

Guilt: I felt this in my chest and stomach. Who was I going to let down?

Scared: I felt this in my chest and throat. I felt fidgety and felt my heart racing. What will come up if I sit? What will surface if I slow down?

Embarrassed: I found myself not wanting to have hard conversations with colleagues and wanted to curl up. Heaviness showing up on my shoulders. What does this mean if I don’t want to keep grinding things out?

Lazy: My body felt tired. I have received messages, explicit and implicit, that if I wasn’t doing something or moving to the next thing, “I was lazy.” My body felt it and I wanted to go to sleep – oh the irony in that, huh?

After feeling all these sensations and leaning in I rested and maybe I still am.

Over the next seven weeks, we are going to explore seven different types of rest.

Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, a physician and the author of Sacred Rest: Recover Your Life, Renew Your Energy, Restore Your Sanity, talks about these seven different types of rest. She wrote the book with the hopes of people being able to make subtle lifestyle changes, understand the different types of rest and incorporate the ones needed on an individual level.

Ironically, I didn’t know this book existed. I didn’t know what to call my rest, I just knew I needed it in a few different forms. Here are the seven types of rest she discusses.

They are:

Physical Rest.

Mental Rest.

Social Rest.

Spiritual Rest.

Sensory Rest.

Emotional Rest.

Creative Rest.

The ones I needed were physical rest, emotional rest, mental rest, and social rest.

Each week we will be exploring the different types of rest and different things you can do to incorporate rest into your life.

I’d love to hear about what type of rest you feel like you need and how do you know you need that type of rest? Take a moment and look at the seven types of rest above and ponder on those questions.

Until then be well, rest, and take care of yourself.

As a therapist in Ogden, UT I am here to assist.  

If you are on a restful journey yourself and want help working through the emotions and navigating what comes up reach out today. As a therapist in Ogden, UT, and someone who specializes in anxiety and stress, and as a trauma therapist I understand how hard it is to slow down. I get it. I offer a free 15-minute phone consultation. Call or text today 385-240-0689.