Trauma Triggers and Triggering - What this is?

As luck would have it, I wrote an entire blog post on trauma and triggers, and guess what, I can't find it. The funny thing is, is this gave me an opportunity to reflect on how far I have come.

The peak of my college years.

During these years, I was also at the height of me feeling dysregulated. In my attempt to regulate my nervous system, perfectionistic tendencies were present. When my attempts at control or perfectionism got interrupted things became hard to navigate.

Being triggered would take over.

It would spin me into a whirlwind of inner and outer chaos. I remember this one experience in particular. I felt like I did everything needed in this class to get an A. At that time, A's were my only option. Remember I was in perfectionism mode. It was the last day of the semester and I was on the brink of an A-. The teacher had an assignment that was due after the class was over. It was a survey to assess how she did. I did not read it on the syllabus. I received the A- and I became so triggered.

I had fear and shame rushing through my body.

I felt panic. I called her crying, asking her if I could do something and she stated, “Nope. You need to read the syllabus.” I felt like I couldn’t breathe and my body was tense. I was pacing back and forth. I was so dysregulated at the time. I still remember this event today. It was difficult for me to regulate and see things in a calm, rational way. I felt like my professor was out to get me and reject me. I couldn’t see past how people would see me or think of me. I felt very disoriented.

At that moment, it felt like my life was over because of an A-. Thoughts and body memories from the past were clearly interrupting my ability to stay in the present. Past trauma memories were showing up in the present.

For a moment let's pause and ask some questions -

Have you had any moments where you have felt that triggered? Did you have a hard time seeing your way through it? What was that experience like? What were your physical sensations, your feelings, and thoughts?

As a trauma therapist in Ogden, I specialize in helping clients who have experienced trauma.

A part of that process is helping them learn what things trigger them and help them begin to recognize when they are triggered. When we experience a trigger things get triggered in us, specifically feeling or body memories. In my example, someone might describe me as “a crazy person” because after all, it was just an A. Yet, what was actually happening is that I was experiencing fear and shame memories. I had feeling memories of fear and shame that got triggered by rejection or the threat of rejection.

For many of my clients who have faced trauma, we begin to build a map and see patterns.

You might notice that authority figures are triggering or disappointment or extended periods of time away from a loved one or rejection. When we begin to notice a pattern, we can begin to build a plan. You can prepare in advance to help create calm, comfort, and support. It is vital for trauma survivors to learn to notice the signs of being triggered, which can, in turn, help them differentiate from the past and present.

A feeling memory might be a combination of many experiences.

It can be easy to want to focus on a specific event or try and place the experience but sometimes that can be more triggering. After my clients have found patterns in their triggers and how they can tell they are triggered, we work on just acknowledging they are triggered. From this point, they can work on becoming more present in the here-and-now.

In the past, losing a writing assignment, having to re-do something, or not completing a task would have triggered me. Now, as I lose a blog post I am slightly agitated. More annoyed that I have to write something again but, I am not triggered. I can calmly think and feel at the same time. My tolerance and emotional resilience have improved and while I am writing this, I have my feet firmly planted on the ground. I have been orienting myself to my surroundings to help bring more regulation. I feel amused at thinking back 15+ years. I feel safe and very much in the present. This is my lived experience. Let me help you through yours.

As a counselor in ogden Utah let me help you Go beyond talk therapy

I will help you learn your trauma triggers and help guide you to a place of feeling safe in the present. As a counselor in Ogden Utah, I know that counseling and trauma therapy can be transformative. Read more about trauma therapy and PTSD treatment here and contact me today.